a feeling like never before

i was telling someone the other day that these past 3 days have felt like 3 full weeks. long, busy, and rough. I was working through some pretty difficult things with someone till 2 in the morning the other night and she challenged me to do something that i've never done to its level before. She challenged me to spend some time on my knees praising God for everything. But specifically for the person He has built me to be and the gifts that He has given me. from the greatest things like my ability to Love on others because this great love He has shown me all the way down to the littlest thing of semi-knowing how to play the guitar. for so long I had my head stuck in this place that was not good. So spending hours doing just this simple thing was the perfect way to stick me back to where i belong and give me a fresh perspective. Once again i'm left in awe of the amazing God I am so lucky to serve.

leading up to all of this, last night I had a conversation with a girl that I will never ever forget. It was my first time ever really being able to share the gospel and walk through the trinity with someone. After sharing with her that she wasn't bound to her past, that God forgives her and that she could live for something that will never leave her empty, she just looked at me full of tears asking what she needed to do. Praying the sinners prayer with her and her accepting Christ was the most amazing feeling ever. It was the first time that God ever put me in a position to do this since i've been saved and I know there will be many more opportunities to do so over in Africa.

so here i sit, i guess i can really say feeling drunk off the holy spirit. haha. it is amazing. also just remembering how outside of all this mess God is, comforts me so much.

back to the basics

I've been experiencing some major hurt lately.

I know a big factor could be the fact that i've been an open target for attack, seeing that I'm going to Kenya in just one week for three months! But still something uncomfortable sits inside me about the "closure" that I intentionally tried so hard to make happen, not happen. Useless worries and pointless fears, I trust that it's in God's hands and all part of his plan. But allowing my flesh to fight this battle lately has been so dangerous for my mind and heart. People aren't perfect.

So now, I'm going back to the basics i honestly lost sight of, God is Good, Trust in Him. Man, It's so hard to remember that.